Swamp Wizards -23- Warming up the golf cart right now!

Stuff just keeps happening with cars and statues and golf club wands. Also beer cans. Those are the best. Definitely the best.

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Swamp Wizards -22- With apologies to David

Last week we left a statue in a creepy suburban neighborhood! Yay!

Oh also, there’s a special little bit at the beginning-ish where the guys help Mike brainstorm a character! Jokes are told! Then it’s time to drive rambunctiously through Orlando! I know it’s exactly what you’re looking for. Let’s go!

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Swamp Wizards -21- Now there's a cool new statue!

AND WE’RE BACK! I’M EXCITED AND I KNOW YOU’RE EXCITED!

Last time we rolled back through vampire territory. I’m still not sure what’s more frightening: magical vampires or suburban lawn expectations. We’re all tangled up in extra servers and secret projects now. Can our wizards of the wetlands gain the victory? Will we talk to villains on the phone again? Who know! Every episode is an adventure!

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Swamp Wizards -20- Are you going to save the dog?

Welp. Even the best editor makes a flub! Can I blame the end of the semester? Well, I’m gonna. At any rate, it’s time to roll through some vampire territory again! This should go great!

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Swamp Wizards -19- Oh God--they're gonna burn down my house!

Okay, so you’re still here with us. You haven’t run off the porch in fear of vampires and robots. That’s a good thing. Maybe now is the right time to switch to some good, strong coffee. Or maybe some bourbon. I’m just gonna tell you this story isn’t gonna get any less weird. So, if you’re still up for it, it’s almost time to examine that sarcophagus.

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Swamp Wizards -18- Time for a New 9-iron

A lot of things have happened now. There’s a club of robots back at the hideout doing some things. There was some aggressive contact with a telephone pole. A lawn was badly mowed. I, personally, am really interested in those robots. But seriously we also do need to find about that switched-up girl because that also sounds creepy. The robots are creepy, too. We can’t let that slide. Really this whole thing has just gotten weird and creepy, so I guess we’ll just keep on going!

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Swamp Wizards -17- The Great Shamu is not yet satisfied!

Now, apparently, we’re stabbing cars and scaring teenaged girls because vampires. It’s all worth it to take out some more of these vampires. Because, you know, vampires. I promise, it’s even worth all the car crashes. It’ll definitely pay off in the end!

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Swamp Wizards -16- Not the plastic flamingo!!?!

Everything is wild and crazy, and now we’re talking a bunch of creepily samey androids back to the “base.” Oh and also there’s that matter of the replaced girl that somebody needs to be looking into. I guess it’s normal to midly harrass the neighbors while we’re out? Anyway, there’s a plastic flamingo, so get ready. It is time!

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Swamp Wizards -15- We didn't know it was a robot at the time

Robots in the trunk, robots in the construction pit, robots all around? I guess we’re all going to find out now. Nothing can be worse than suddenly ghouls and vampires, right? This should be fine.

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Swamp Wizards -14- There will definitely be a cool story

Hm. Well, so now there’s a pit. Robot-in-the-trunk said it was totally fine, so obviously it’s not totally fine at all, and they should probably figure a way in there and check it out. I, for one, think that’s definitely reasonable. Totally, completely reasonable. Just like keeping that robot in the trunk. Yes.

Never a dull moment around here.

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Swamp Wizards -13- Time for Something Decently Foolish

Look, I can’t explain all the crashing into the mall or the explody construction pit or the vampires, but at least nobody jumped into a pneumatic trash chute. Yet. There’s still time. Can I refresh that iced tea for you?

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Swamp Wizards -12- Look, just shoot the engine block already

Alright alright alright. We found the missing lady and got paid! The fridge is still stocked with medium-quality beer, though, because that’s how Florida Man likes it. Maybe it’s time for a celebrational joy ride? What am I saying—it’s always time for a celebrational joy ride. Whoo-eee! Let’s go!

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Swamp Wizards -11- Aw man...there's another one!

Feelings of impending doom, mental voices, rows of creepy dungeon cells, and definitely feeling like this is not the place to be—sounds like it’s time to check in with our…team of…detective type…people. Yeah.

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Swamp Wizards -10- Time for that feeling of impending doom!

Our team has discovered some trouble. The mystery of a missing woman has turned into some serious weirdness of cult guys, some strage creatures in some in-between place, fractal mouths, and cool pnuemotube trash bins! Oh and also this is all bad. Or is it? Hmmmm.

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Swamp Wizards -9- Hold my beer...FOUR!!!

Once upon a time, there was a lovely Magic Kingdom where people flocked to be happy and joyous. But every so often someone vanished. And this time, a small band of stalwart “investigators” have gotten involved. So far, their efforts have been a bust, but now…now! Well, now they’ve split the party and suddenly encountered a blasted wasteland of impaled souls and cultists with fractal sets of mouths. But you know, they have beer and golf clubs, so the playing field is definitely even.

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Swamp Wizards -8- Do we take the car or the golf cart this time?

Okay. So we haven’t really found a lot of clues to the missing lady. We did discover that the trash can was not actually a hell portal. So that’s one thing. And we maybe discovered a connection that led half the party (because of course we split the party) to a waste management facility. Only to find creepy cultists. So that’s going to to be great. Especially with the party split. Guess we better find out how this goes now!

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Swamp Wizards -7-So that's where the back entrance is.

Y’all. Y’all! Disney has a pneumatic trash system y’all. This may be better than the pre-story Goofy battle!

Okay, but seriously, the weirdly-empty trash can did not, unfortunately (or fortunately?) open into a hellmouth, so we’re slightly at square one, again. Hm. Somebody’s gonna need to sharpen their investigation skills, I guess. Let’s find out who!

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Swamp Wizards -6- This is the Happiest Place on Earth...

Last week my description had a typo! This week I will ensure it does not! 

There's a mystery afoot! And it's going down at Disney! Maybe. At least something's happening by the castle. Oh also no one has any investigation skills, so this should go really well. You've all got your tickets, so let's go!

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