Episode 47: Get out of that corner, Gazren; it's full of religion people keep losing.

Look, the birds said to go into the woods, right? How were we supposed to know there was a dimensional portal disguised as a tree ring of doom? It's not like we have these situations just pop up all the time. And really, who wouldn't want to save a teleport scroll just in case there was more danger? Gazren will definitely survive a little cross-religion prayer. It's no big deal, I'm sure. Let's just look around the weird, gigantic library, all right?

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Episode 46: So we've got some orbs and some army, time for residuum!

The Wreckateers finally found the bottom of that basement! Then they realized that they totally forgot about asking the gods they already follow for some help! Well, they'll get there soon, but first: residuum! There's only one other creepy island around, and that's Man-sized Roc Island! (Not to be confused with the Rock Island Line, both a railroad and a song) Guess they'll be headed over there to find even more mysteries and maybe fight off some giant-ass birds. Stay tuned for the outcome!

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Episode 45: How deep is this basement? And seriously, why does that thing hum?

On Creepy Fortress Island, the Wreckateers must brave the risk of strange descending platforms to find what lurks in the depths below. So far, the results have been bleak: two gods have offered them armies and power but asked too much in return; two gods have been refused. How many floors must they descend to find an offer they can accept? Mysteries lurk below, yet it remains to be seen if any may be helpful as the fate of the world lies heavy on their shoulders. Okay, well heavy on some of their shoulders--after all, one of them is a heartless automaton and the other is a murderbot, so there's that. This could get really interesting. 

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Episode 44: Lash, no; Lash, stop it; Lash, we've talked about this.

In a world where an angry god squeezes through a portal and one man must rely on hotel internet service, these 6 must explore Creepy Fort Island. Together they will face cliffs and ruins and Lash's unrelenting search for "volunteers" for her undead army. Together they will face this world and *spoilers*.

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Episode 43: All of the tridents are everywhere! Somebody clean up this mess!

Last episode there were sea monsters and fish people and reinforcements: oh my! This episode there are still fish people and monsters and reinforcements? Will the battle ever end? Will our intrepid group of zombie-crewed pirate-wanna-bes survive? Will having a murder robot turn out for good or ill? What does it do with all those vials? Why is this post almost entirely interrogative sentences? Tune in to find out? 

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Episode 42: Badger, badger, badger, badger, mushroom, mushroom, snaaaaaaaaaake

And they're off! Following some particularly dramatic displays of stubborn Wreckateers and the powers of magical doorknobs, our fair crew set off toward Creepy Fortress Island. Just when they thought they were in for a peaceful voyage across the sea few of them had the fortitude to enjoy, a wild sea monster appeared, depositing scaly, trident-wielding enemies around their ship's decks! Initiative has been rolled, so to battle! 

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Episode 41: Here a crew, there a crew, everywhere a crew, crew.

Still yet to be decided: to keep or not to keep! 

This group remains divided, and some with anger weep.

With stances set and will resolved, no compromise yet reached;

Will futures be misguided? Is doom what we shall reap?

Listen, and find out!

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5e Throning Games: All I know is, where there's smoke, there's Surprise!

And now, we have reached the last of our interrupting trio of 5e sessions. Yet, fear not! This story shall indeed continue at later dates to be announced in future times. For now, though, attend as our fabulous Ser and his crew of minions...ahem, I mean mercenaries, face the dark things that turn up as they chase down smoke and merchants. In all, it shall be a raucous adventure to not wrap things up at all! But, fair listeners, there are still undead crew to manage and wakened gods to destroy. All things in their time.

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5e: Throning Games: Fish or Foul - Let's Make a Deal!

In our last episode, your favorite D&D crew rolled up some jokes and hijinks and some characters came out the other end. There was a sick lord, a fabulous Ser, and a crew of mercenaries who had seen better days. And now all must gather together to meet and greet the Codds, hopefully with some bargaining chips to lay on the table. Will the fabulous Ser and his dismissive sister take the money in front of them, or will they take a chance on what's behind the curtain? It's time to make a deal!

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5e Throning Games: You need some characters? I'll get you some characters.

Dear lovely listeners,

And now, your favorite party of players tries something new for a little while! Don't worry, we'll get back to our argument over whether or not to keep those undead seamen around before you're totally ready. I promise. In the meantime, we acquiesce to our listeners desires and try our hands at some more 5e, now in (slightly) more published form! So here we go! 

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Episode 40: Hear a tale, a tale of the Olden Days, part deux

It is a tale of time long, long ago when magic was yet unknown, when evil things lurked in the woods, when flying ink wells were terrifying. Before the Wreckateers was, before the town of Axis was, before the plans for flying ships were even gleams in the eye of the Raven Queen, before all this there was a band of barely known adventurers out to make their name. Now they have a quest worthy of that goal: kill the corrupt tree in the heart of the Creepy...I mean...Twilight Woods and bring back some heart wood. Let us now gather round and hear the continuation of this Olden Days tale!

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Episode 39: Let's go back--way back--way back to the olden days

A long time ago when the world was younger by some 200 years, there was a group of stalwarts making a name for themselves in a smallish town. Who were they? What implications did their actions have on our fair Wreckateers? Listen and discover the Olden Days--when magic was but a twinkle in the eye of this plane.

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Episode 38: No, really; what do we do with them?

To keep, or not to keep--that is the question:
Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer
Heresy and outright offense to the Raven Queen
Or to take prayers and priests to Ship of Fog
And cleanse it, fair ship anew. To pray, to purge--
All cleanse--and by this purge to say we end
The heresy, and the great affront we see before
Our very selfsame eyes. 'Tis a divination
Devoutly to be sought. To pray, to purge--
To purge--sent to Shadowfell: ay, there's the rub,
For once gone, a soul may not return.
When we have truly purged this Ship of Fog,
Our crew is gone. There's the trouble
Created for us in time of dire need.
For who would crew this ghostly ship if not these,
mysterious men, crew of mysty origins
Followers of the Lasher, answerers to none else,
those who shun the towns, yet know this bark
Better than all else who may be swayed to our cause,
When we must go and fight a god
With a flying ship? Who would else come,
To face dread risk and danger and even death,
But these crew already perhaps dead in silence,
The ones who have waited long, and wait yet
To find their fate, and still wait on.
What shall we do with these whose origin
And self and soulish state we know not of?
Thus zealous hearts make philosophers of us all,
And thus the party's hue of resolution
Is shaken in its core by troubled thought,
And quests on which the fate of this planal home
With this argument do flounder and pause
And lose the name of action

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Episode 37: So now we have this boat, but what do we do with the dead ones?

So last time, there was this cave and then there were some riddles and finally some discovering of a creepy Fog Boat. But now what to do? Up next, our menagerie of mayhem will discuss upgrades, talk about poop, and argue about dead guys. You just can't make this stuff up! Okay well, you can, but that's not the point. Hush. 

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Episode 36: Wreckateer Shipping Company

I mean, they're not like transporting packages or anything. But I guess they aren't getting in relationships with each other. Not yet. Not since that day. 

Hm? Oh! Right! So the group is in a cave. They're looking around for loot, as adventuring types are known to do. Will they find it? Will there be riddles? If I'm GMing, probably. And I am, so... yes? 

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Episode 35: So for ships, you see, you have your light wood, your medium wood, and your hard wood.

 

 

 

So there was this vision and these blueprints and this journey with a caravan driver named Rando. And after all that, there was a signpost, a decision, and a town. But finally, they have arrived. And yet it seems their list of tasks just keep getting longer: find a shipwright, find a better deal, find an elf. Wait. That's not on the group's to-do list. I have no idea where that came from....ahem. Anyway, where was...oh yes: find supplies, beat the god. That's what we're doing here. Ahahaha haha hah. hm. 

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Episode 34: But he seemed so nice; he totally did!

Across the centuries of humanity's existence, there have always been tales of adventurers seeking glory, ships of great destiny, and quests of vital importance. These tales spark something within us that yearns for greatness and the salt spray of the ocean. In this evening's episode, we will find....

...wait. That's my Masterpiece Theater voice. Whoops! Yeah, so our adventurers are headed to a port town to find a shipwright to build them the airship from the plans they received during a vision of the Raven Queen. That's totally normal, right? Happens to a lot of people. It totally does. Let us join them as they travel coastward in search of their mighty quest. (I let a little more Masterpiece slip in--it has a way of sneaking up on me.)

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Episode 33: Turn up the Salt; Turn up the Sass

Wow. "Discussion" abounds as the Wreckateers try to figure out where to go next for their supreme quest. Things escalate a bit and people get a bit snippy with each other. A decision is reached, though! And then a person is met. At a place. And they head to another place and meet another person. Then there are some events. #synopsispro

Enjoy!

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Episode 31: Some Things You Can't Unread

We are back from our short 5e hiatus! The wreckateers are back in action after some distressing events around town. One back thing happening doesn't mean other bad things won't! Some good happens here as well as the discovery about some less good. Give it a listen!

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